Monday, December 31, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Bayley

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today, I'm not writing anything. That is because Lukewarm Jonah is more passionate about this wrestler than I am about anything in professional wrestling. That's right; IT'S BAYLEY!

************

The WWE is ruining Bayley.  The WWE is ruining Bayley more than they’re ruining any other wrestler.  Joe asked me to write this entry because I believe in Bayley more than he does, but I’m worried I believe in her too much.  Nevermind, that’s stupid, you can’t believe in Bayley too much.  Bayley is one of the best wrestlers in the WWE.  Bayley has one of the best characters in the WWE.  Bayley is one of the most likeable wrestlers in the WWE.  Let me illustrate this point.  I’m a grown man who, despite writing multiple articles about professional wrestling, keeps his fandom mostly in the closet.  I own one item of wrestling apparel, and it’s a Bayley shirt that says “I’m A Hugger”.  I wear it out proudly in public.  Simply put, Bayley is my jam.  Bayley’s match against Sasha Banks at NXT Brooklyn was my absolute favorite match from the time it happened until Johnny Gargano took on Andrade Almas at Takeover this year.  Still, being half of the second best match ever is a pretty good accomplishment.

Bayley has been booked into oblivion, but she’s still decently over.  The WWE will have you asking yourself was she just over in NXT where most people are over?  The answer is no, the RAW crowds were chanting for Bayley to debut for two years.  When she debuted as Sasha’s partner on PPV the roof blew off the house.  When she debuted on RAW, the roof blew off the house.  Crowds kept chanting that they wanted some Bayley.  The WWE did what I’m sure they thought was a favor to Bayley by having her beat Charlotte Flair on PPV for Flair’s first PPV loss ever.  Bayley had won the championship on RAW with help from Banks.  The problem was they did this one month before Wrestlemania where it would have meant a lot more, they also had her win with help from Sasha Banks.  Face wrestlers shouldn’t have outside help, it’s not that complicated.  They then had Stephanie McMahon dress her down for the way she won the next night on RAW.  They blew the moment that could have made Bayley a huge star, having her win the title clean at Wrestlemania, but she still remained over because she’s Bayley.  Bayley then lost the title to Alexa Bliss, which ended her title reign at a little over two months.

This lead to the feud that really killed Bayley.  There was the “This Is Your Life” segment that is one of the worst segments the WWE has ever put on, and that’s saying something.  The point of the segment was that Bayley was a nerd growing up because she was a wrestling fan.  Just remember that’s how the WWE views their own fans, as nerds.  Bayley then famously got in a kendo stick on a pole match against Bliss where Bayley got the kendo stick, but was too nice to use it, causing her to lose the match.  She then gave an interview explaining that she didn’t want to hurt anyone, which is a weird thing for a professional wrestler who fights people for a living to say.  Bayley then got screwed over by her best friend Sasha Banks a bunch, which seemed like it would lead to a feud between the two but never really did, and that’s been about the past year of her career.

So that’s what we’re up against here, over two years of crappy booking.  The insane thing is that it’s really not that hard to get her back over.  The pop that happened when she attacked Sasha that one week was insane.  People want Bayley to be successful, they want her to show a bit of edge.  Not too much mind you, Bayley is still a super sweet character, but she shouldn’t be afraid to use weapons in a weapons match.  So here’s what needs to happen.  The WWE just introduced women’s tag team belts.  Bayley and Sasha need to win these titles.  This will keep her on TV and winning matches on TV.  This Wrestlemania women’s main event should be set as Ronda Rousey taking on Becky Lynch, it makes sense for this year.  Bayley can be as big as Becky Lynch.  Sometime after Wrestlemania, Bayley and Sasha need to lose the titles.  Sasha needs to blame Bayley and be a heel, as it’s her best alignment anyways.  Bayley needs to stand up to her and vanquish her.  This will make Bayley a main eventer again, and she can win the RAW women’s title from Becky Lynch.  Then at next year’s Wrestlemania she can fight Becky or Ronda Rousey coming back for her title.  During this time, just book her like Bayley.  She’s a pure white meat babyface, but that doesn’t mean she’s an idiot or a literal child.  She doesn’t cheat, but she’s not afraid to dole out a beating when it’s deserved.  She’s fun outside of the ring and kids and adults love her, but she’s one of the best wrestlers there is inside the ring.  Good news, she already is that talented.

I mentioned this year’s Wrestlemania and it’s important to talk about because it’s the first year where the women could legitimately main event, and I mean main event like go on last and close the show.  Rousey has the name value and pop culture appeal for the casual fans to be interested and Becky Lynch is the most over performer on the roster.  If they put it together like they should, it will literally be the biggest match they put on, but they probably don’t have the guts to actually put it on last.  I mention this because I think Bayley vs. Lynch at next year’s Wrestlemania could be bigger.  It won’t have the name value of Rousey, but they can make Bayley as over as Lynch by following the very simple steps I laid out.  The WWE could have it’s two most over performers face off at Wrestlemania like when Austin took on The Rock, and the crazy thing is, the two most over wrestlers on their shows could be women.  Have Charlotte Flair take on Rousey for the other title in the semi main event and show how much you care about women’s wrestling.

In conclusion, Bayley is criminally underused and underappreciated right now.  The WWE Universe still absolutely loves her, so all it takes is one good moment for her to hit the stratosphere.  Give her the tag titles, let her overcome Sasha Banks, and start counting your money because she will sell more merchandise than anyone else on the roster.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas
Bobby Lashley

Bobby Roode
Charlotte Flair
Curt Hawkins

Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon
Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Killian Dain
Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson
Shinsuke Nakamura
Tyler Breeze

Thursday, December 27, 2018

The Ultimate NXT Draft Review: 11-20

In June of 2016, so now nearly two and a half years ago, Lukewarm Jonah and I got together to do an NXT Fantasy Draft. We are going to focus on the NXT roster as the transition from NXT to the main roster or just the progression within NXT provides some fascinating talking points. Although we did a fairly good job, there were definitely some big time misses and some amazing steals. We've already broken down the top 10, so let's look at picks 11-20 today.


11. Joe selects Tye Dillinger
Jonah: Tye Dillinger is awesome, but very underused, kind of like in NXT.  He’s very entertaining and good, not great in the ring. He’s a guy who can be in the midcard for a decade, and could move up if the WWE ever wanted to use him that way.  Solid pick, but there are some people below who are better, he probably moves down about 10, 10, 10 picks in the redraft.


Joe: Yeah, Jonah is correct in everything he said. He just never got a chance to get his character over, and now he’s in the abyss of underutilized WWE talent.


12-13. Jonah selects The Revival
Joe: Well, let me just start by saying Fuck The Revival. But these guys had injury issues at the worst possible time, and WWE has not shown any inclination that they are ready to trust them. They can have great tag matches, but despite the WWE having an overload of tag talent, they can’t seem to utilize more than two teams at a time. Hopefully 2019 turns things around as their matches with DIY, American Alpha, and Authors of Pain will go down as some of the best tag wrestling in WWE history.


But seriously, Fuck The Revival.


Jonah: Joe, FTR stands for Forever the Revival.  They’ve been retweeted by some young bucks quite often these days so if there was heat it’s all gone.  The Revival should be higher on this draft, they’re an incredible tag team, but they’re so horribly used.  I could see them making an impact this next year after a shoutout from Seth Rollins. If the WWE fails them miserably, I can see them being great in AEW.


14-15. Joe selects Nia Jax and Mojo Rawley
Jonah: Nia Jax is pretty over and featured on RAW most weeks.  She is also really good at injuring people, which isn’t a great skill to have.  In her time on the main roster Jax has injured Bayley, Zelina Vega, Alexa Bliss, Charlotte Flair and of course Becky Lynch.  This article isn’t about ragging on Jax, but there has to be a concern if you have a wrestler on your show that isn’t good at keeping her opponents healthy.  That being said, she’s a former champ and this is a good spot for her to get drafted. Mojo, oh Mojo,if you came around 10 to 15 years ago you’d be a huge star, but wrestlers have to be able to wrestle these days.  Mojo isn’t awful, but compared to the immense talent they have company wide, he stands out as not being great. He could be a great opener, using his hypeness and having fun with the kids. Or he could be a main event heel if they made him Triple M and paired him up with Jay Cutler.  In a redraft Mojo falls a decent amount, but he could still have a future.


Joe: Sorry that Jonah is a snowflake who can’t handle Nia Jax getting REAL and hurting people all of the time. But seriously, Nia Jax still has a great presence, seems like a really nice person and is not great at professional wrestling. But with her hanging out with Tamina, she’s basically Ricky Steamboat out there. Mojo won a battle royal once, but yeah, I wish I could have had this pick back.


16-17. Jonah selects Johnny Gargano and Tomasso Ciampa
Joe: When I’m wrong, I say I’m wrong, and boy was I wrong about Johnny Gargano. People freaking loved Johnny Wrestling, and I just saw an undersized guy who was fine. Like, definitely good at wrestling, but I just didn’t see anything special. I did like Ciampa, but with them being a packaged deal, I really had no interest in them, and I was wrong. Gargano’s great. Ciampa’s great. But they’ve been around for three years and still haven’t gotten the call-up, and that is my big concern. What is the WWE going to do with these guys on the main roster?


Jonah: Triple H is just waiting for Vince to give him full control before he calls up Gargano and Ciampa, he saw what he did to Asuka and he will never forget that pain.  Gargano puts on five star matches basically every Takeover, it’s pretty amazing. His character has become well flushed out, and even though I don’t like the white meat babyface turning evil, it seems to be working out for him.  Lost in the talk of how great Gargano is, is how great Ciampa is. He’s the NXT champ, putting on phenomenal matches, and being an amazing heel. No one will survive Ciampa, no one. As a package, these guys are way higher up in the redraft, they’re two main eventers in NXT.  At worst, they should be reunited as a dominant tag team who kills it on whatever show they go to. They should have a good showing on the main roster, but who knows with the booking.


Joe: The good news is that WWE has a far better track record with guys who stay in NXT for a long time as opposed to guys who get quick callups, so hopefully they have a plan for them. If they actually did a better job with 205 Live, these guys would be ideal for that show before bumping up to heavyweight, but if you’re pushing a tiny white guy, I feel like Finn Balor and Daniel Bryan are taking most of the opportunities. But yes, they have been awesome, and I really hope the WWE allows them to continue to be awesome.


18-19. Joe selects Carmella and No Way Jose
Jonah: I underestimated Carmella, and she’s a good pick here.  She’s super annoying as a heel, so annoying that I didn’t think it was possible for her to be a face, but she’s proved herself as a good face.  She’s not excellent in the ring, but she’s passable. She has a good character and she’s entertaining. It’s a solid pick. I thought they were making No Way Jose a guy who was fun outside the ring but could get it done in the ring at the end of his NXT run.  On the main roster they’ve decided to not have him wrestle or be on TV, which seems to be hurting his popularity. If you don’t have anything for the guy, leave him in developmental and let him get better, doesn’t seem like rocket science to me. No Way Jose has to drop in the redraft, but at least he’s got potential.


Joe: Yeah, I really have nothing to add to your analysis of either of them except that Carmella is undefeated in matches where a friend cosplays as her opponent.


20. Jonah selects Elias Samson
Joe: Man, I should have paid attention to what I saw in person instead of what I saw on TV with this guy. Elias was always great at house shows, because he would just tear apart the Largo crowd in his songs, but they never let him do it on NXT, and he was super bland. Then, he got a sudden call-up to the main roster and they gave him full reign, and it’s clear that the WWE thinks he has a bright future. This was an excellent pick, and it really wouldn’t be a shock if you told me he had one of the five best WWE careers of anyone on this list.


Jonah: Yeah, super happy with this pick.  He’s probably in the US/Intercontinental Championship picture, and I could see him winning it at Wrestlemania.  He’s super over, and has actually transitioned to a face, which seemed difficult for him. His heat in Seattle was legitimately the biggest heat any person has had since the Attitude Era.  He’s nothing special in the ring, but he’s good enough. He will have a successful career, unless the WWE screws it up royally, which they probably will. Still a good pick here, he moves up a few spots in the redraft.


Joe: I actually think you are underselling this pick. If you had the choice of Elias or Ciampa or Gargano, don’t you have to go with Elias? He’s done it on the big show and gotten over with what the WWE has given him. He’s shown the biggest trait in being a star and that is being so good at being a heel that the crowd can’t help but cheer for you. I almost feel like we need to come together for a rankings at the end of this thing to really find out where guys should go.


Jonah: I probably am underselling Elias a bit.  He’s entertaining as hell. He’s got a good shot at being a future world champion.

Previous Installments:
Picks 1-10

Wednesday, December 26, 2018

The Ultimate NXT Draft Review: 1-10

In June of 2016, so now nearly two and a half years ago, Lukewarm Jonah and I got together to do both a WWE main roster and NXT Fantasy Draft. There isn’t a ton of analysis to do with the main roster, but despite me having the Universal Champion, Brock Lesnar, and the greatest wrestler in the world, Shane McMahon, I’d probably give the edge to Jonah on those picks.

But I would like to focus on the NXT roster as the transition from NXT to the main roster or just the progression within NXT provides some fascinating talking points. Although we did a fairly good job, there were definitely some big time misses and some amazing steals. Let’s break it down pick-by-pick, starting with the top 10 today.

1. Jonah selects Finn Balor
Joe: This was an obvious first overall pick. The guy was the NXT Champion, and The Demon was the most undeniably awesome thing in all of WWE. Although WWE is definitely over their big guys must reign mentality, little guys do often get left behind. His shoulder injury happened at the worst possible time, and it’s really destroyed his standing in the company. Without that injury, he could have had a very different run, but now he’s kind of stuck in the midcard with no aim. Hopefully, Royal Rumble turns things around as in, turns him into the leader of an evil group of wrestlers from New Japan called the Missile Gang.

Jonah: Finn is still probably the number one pick in a redraft.  The crowd still absolutely loves him after years of terrible booking, so one of these days he’s going to get another run.  He’s the first Universal Champion, and he’s really in the upper midcard. He’s on the verge of breaking out again and I hear there’s a bunch of sweet wrestlers coming from ROH.

2-3. Joe selects Shinsuke Nakamura and Bayley
Jonah: These picks made me very angry at the time because I really wanted both of them.  But now it’s really turned into who has been booked worse on the main roster? Bayley has won the world title, but had a terrible reign and has been booked as an afterthought for basically her entire time.  Nakamura recently won his first and only title on the main roster the US title, but he won the Royal Rumble and even though he lost 600 or so of his first title shots, he still feels like kind of a threat. The biggest shock about Nakamura is that he hasn’t had very good matches.  At the time of our draft he had just torn the house down with Sami Zayn in NXT, now he puts on average matches with AJ Styles and bad matches with a lot of other people. He’s still oozing with charisma and cool as hell, but his matches are very concerning. Bayley could still be one of the most popular performers on the roster.  When she turned on Sasha for that week, the pop was insane. She’s Becky Lynch on RAW, one moment and the crowd will blow the roof off the house. Still very good picks, but in a redraft, I don’t know about them going two and three, I think they fall a round or two.

Joe: Shit, man. I drafted Bayley, and I’m not even that high on her. Her only really memorable matches happened against Sasha Banks, and this was probably at the height of her popularity. Nowadays, I’m not even sure if she makes my top five women from this draft. She still has a ton of potential, but I have trouble seeing a pathway to her actually reaching it.

As for Nakamura, the charisma is through the roof, but anytime he starts to develop an interesting character, the WWE writers take over, and they have him show Rusev naked and call him a girl. That’s....not great. But Nakamura has also seemed disinterested during a lot of his WWE run, but who could blame him? The WWE had the chance to pull the trigger on him but chose not to, and although he’s still a top guy, he’s probably not going to be THE guy. That being said, he still might be a top three pick if we did the draft again.

4-5. Jonah selects Samoa Joe and Asuka
Joe: Hey, Asuka is finally getting the push she should have gotten a long time ago. Good lord, remember when she couldn’t handle when someone cosplayed as her and lost to Carmella a bunch of times. But no, she’s awesome, and I would totally take her over Bayley.

Samoa Joe has almost done cool stuff, but everything he does just seems to drag on forever and lead nowhere. It’s still exciting when he starts something new as he’s excellent at getting things off to a hot start, but it all just goes nowhere. That being said, this is still a good pick as I can’t see him falling out of the top ten even with a disappointing run on the main roster.

Jonah: I still love these two picks.  Joe is still super over, even though he loses all of his big matches just like Nakamura.  The difference is Joe can go in the ring and cuts an insane promo. They booked themselves into a corner with Asuka’s undefeated streak, then ended it at the worst time, then booked her like crap for a year.  Despite that, people still love Asuka and she’s great in the ring. She’s also got the Nakamura charisma where she’s cool as hell so it doesn’t matter what she says.

Joe: Jonah, your definition of super over is far different than anything existing in reality. Super over guys in WWE are Braun Strowman, Becky Lynch, and Ronda Rousey. If I stretch the definition, it could include Seth Rollins, Rusev, Daniel Bryan, and New Day. Joe is at least two tiers away from that.

Jonah: Joe can realistically be put into the World Title scene at any time and it makes sense, that’s being over.  He’s great on the mic and in the ring. Someday he will be used correctly and get super duper over.

Joe: Getting in the World Title scene at any time, huh? So like Jinder Mahal? I get it.

6-7. Joe selects American Alpha
Jonah: I got fired up writing about how bad the booking of Bayley and Nakamura was but American Alpha was much worse.  They are the best tag team the WWE has had since the Hardy Boys. Naturally, the WWE booked them super boring. They won the titles, but the crowd eventually turned on them because they did nothing but wrestle awesome, which is cool but the WWE forgot that they were charismatic as hell in NXT.  For some reason American Alpha got broken up, Jason Jordan became Kurt Angle’s kid, and Gable is still killing it and is now in another boring tag team. Keep them together and Jordan never gets injured,and American Alpha is dominating the tag team division right now. Another couple of picks that drop in a redraft, I mean I’m not sure if Jordan ever wrestles again, but Gable does have a ton of potential.  Great pick at the time, ruined now by bad booking and injuries.

Joe: I love Chad Gable, because he made piss pants jokes to Drake Maverick, and that makes him cool and not a horribly depressing babyface. I still don’t mind the pick as Jason Jordan just needs to get healthy to be decent, and Chad Gable’s ceiling is still incredibly high. I honestly think that Chad Gable may be the guy I would most want to see in NJPW, and that is why I have no regrets about the pick, because when they actually let him go, he’s still fantastic.

8-9. Jonah selects Hideo Itami and Austin Aries
Joe: LOL, well this didn’t work out as planned for you, Jonah. I was never high on Aries, but I didn’t see it ending that quickly. Hideo Itami is super fun in person, but I don’t think his style when put through the WWE incubator ever really translated on television. I think he might be injured, or he might be active on 205 Live; there’s really no difference. I like Itami, but we’re at the point where any good idea for a Japanese wrestler would go to Asuka or Nakamura, meaning they would need THREE good ideas for Japanese wrestlers for Itami to do something interesting. Can FOUR McMahons come up with three foreign ideas? Spoiler alert: The answer is no.

Jonah: Yeah this one hurts to look back on.  Aries at least put on a year of good matches on 205 Live, his match with Neville at Wrestlemania 33 was the best match on the card.  I didn’t see Aries bailing so quickly, but that’s kind of what he does. Itami is still active on 205 Live, but it’s baffling how they’ve used him.  Remember back when Enzo was the douche king of the WWE and Cruiserweight champ? No one could challenge him for the title because no one could refrain from attacking him.  The general manager then brought out a new signing to 205 Live to beat up Enzo and everyone was pumped and it turned out to be Kalisto, and everyone was confused. Imagine if that was Itami, and he came out and just killed Enzo with a GTS, that would have made him.  Anyways, Itami could still be a star, but he probably won’t be in the WWE.

Joe: I really hope you’re right on Itami, and I would say there is significant hope with the PPV (preshow) matches that the guys on 205 Live have had as well as the recent surge from Mustafa Ali on Smackdown.

10. Joe selects Alexa Bliss
Jonah: I was a huge fan of Alexa Bliss at the time of the draft, but I did not she would ever be a wrestling threat on the main roster.  She’s a great promo, but still a very average wrestler and she’s extremely tiny. This new head of the women’s division is probably the best spot for her, but she’s a five time women’s champion.  She’ll be back wrestling again once she’s healthy. Bliss would move up in the redraft, in the top five or right outside it. Great view of potential by Joe here.

Joe: I think top five might be underestimating it. Out of everyone in this draft, Alexa Bliss has had BY FAR the most success on the main roster. Are we sure she isn’t the number one overall pick in a redraft? But yeah, she far exceeded my expectations, and I think it’s safe to say that she has been the best talker in the WWE since the time of our original draft.

Jonah: I wouldn’t take her number one overall in a redraft, though she has been the most successful person on the main roster.  The in ring talent isn’t there, and I’d be worried that she’s not going to be able to rise above Rousey ever again.

Monday, December 24, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Curt Hawkins

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today, we look at Curt Hawkins who needs to look to the past to find his redemption.

Curt Hawkins has been on a bit of a losing streak. The last time he didn't lose was back in February of 2017 against Dean Ambrose. He didn't win the match, but he at least got a no contest, which is basically like winning a title when it comes to Hawkins. In October 2016, he did beat something called Chase Silver in a dark match, but I'm not even sure if we can count that. But earlier in that month, in his very first match since resigning full time with the WWE, he beat Apollo Crews. He has not won in any sort of match since.

As rough of a go as Hawkins has had, it has been even rougher for his tag partners. Since signing with the WWE, he has teamed with Zack Ryder, Caylen Croft, Vance Archer, Tyler Reks, and Val Venis in 2014, five years after he was released by the WWE. So three of those guys retired, two in their relative physical prime, one was released by WWE although he has had success in the tag division overseas, and one guy probably wished he got released, because the WWE has done everything they can to choke off his self-made popularity. It is not a great idea to tag up with Curt Hawkins.

So what should the WWE do? Well, as bad as tag teaming has been for his partners, one of them actually did manage to stick around the WWE and even start a podcast with his former partner, so let's get Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins officially back together. Are they going to immediately be one of the better tag teams on the Raw roster? No, but they will be a tag team that makes sense, and that should put them in title contention when you have a team like Chad Gable and Bobby Roode as champions. Their main objective will be getting heel tag teams over, but as a tag team, they are strong enough to get on the occasional hot streak and threaten the champs. I know it doesn't sound like much, but it's a huge step up from where they are right now, and if you actually let these guys show their personality, they have the chance to build a real fanbase and become a very interesting tag team.

There is no reason not to do it, so I do not expect it to happen anytime soon.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas
Bobby Lashley

Bobby Roode
Charlotte Flair
Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon
Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Killian Dain

Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson
Shinsuke Nakamura
Tyler Breeze

Monday, December 17, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Bobby Roode

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today, we take a look at the GLORIOUS, Bobby Roode.

Bobby Roode truly came out of nowhere to burst onto the NXT scene and become the NXT Champion. He was never an indy darling and appears to have stopped wrestling on the independent scene after getting a couple matches in the WWE in 2004. Yep, between then and his NXT debut in 2016, he only wrestled a handful of matches in New Japan. But outside of that, it appears he was just chilling, definitely not doing anything of note in any organization.

Anyway, the important thing is Bobby Roode came in and talked about how awful and poor the fans were in order to generate heat. The man was made to be a heel as even his smile makes him look like an asshole. He got that cheap heat, but fans also LOVED his entrance theme, and the WWE heard this love of his entrance theme and thought, "Bobby Roode, what a classic babyface." This was a bad decision.

He quickly won the United States Title after being called up, but since he was WWE's version of cool, he really sucked ass and nobody cared, so his only discernible characteristic was saying glorious a lot. He lost the title, nothing important happened, he tagged with Chad Gable because they didn't have anything important for either guy, and then for some reason they just won the tag titles on Raw last week.

Winning titles would seem to indicate the WWE is doing something positive with a guy, but no, this title reign is stupid, because the team isn't very good, and they pinned the manager of the tag champions to win the belts, so it doesn't even make sense why they are champions.

So what should the WWE do moving forward? First off, find new tag champions. I'm fine with AOP winning them back, I'd love to see The Revival as champions, and hell, since they won them in an asinine way, they can lose them in an asinine way if Lucha House Rules are in effect. But no matter how it happens, Bobby Roode must attack Chad Gable after the match and finally turn heel.

Then, if you want to push Roode to any sort of title level, he needs friends. Roode has charisma, but his ring work is only solid, so that isn't enough to help him stand out. He's best as a cowardly heel, and a cowardly heel can't do it alone. The easiest pairing would be to have him help AOP win the titles by turning on Chad Gable, and building his heat by destroying Drake Maverick. Then he has two bruisers who can be the tag champs while having Roode as their mouthpiece, and they can help Roode in his matches to make him a more legitimate contender.

I think you can start him off by abusing Chad Gable with his newfound muscle. Then Gable gets help from his old friend, Jason Jordan, and they reunite American Alpha to take on AOP to get Bobby Roode out of that feud and onto his own thing. Then just let him be a heel, maybe get him an Intercontinental Title match on occasion and just see where things go. But at least let the guy be a heel.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas
Bobby Lashley
Charlotte Flair
Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon
Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Killian Dain

Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson

Shinsuke Nakamura
Tyler Breeze

Thursday, December 13, 2018

I Wish WWE Treated Legends Like NJPW

The New Japan Tag League is one of their least impressive tournaments. NJPW really shines when it comes to single matches, but tag matches are often treated as filler, and even though these matches were better than filler, most are designed to further a story rather than give you a memorable moment. Still, there were many takeaways from the tournament in setting up Wrestle Kingdom, but maybe my biggest takeaway was the difference in how NJPW and WWE treat their legends.

In short, old dudes look like old dudes and they get absolutely owned. They have true legends like Nakanishi and Nagata teaming up while Tenzan teamed up with Kojima. Although these names probably aren't well known to American fans, these dudes are legitimate legends in Japanese wrestling.

Nakanishi won the World Title once and was a tag champion three times. Nagata won the World Title twice and the tag titles twice. It should also be noted that someone really hates Yuji Nagata as the man also had two MMA fights. He fought Fedor Emelianenko and Cro Cop. They literally called Cro Cop, "The Pro Wrestling Hunter" when he was announced to the crowd. It was awesome.

And this is nothing compared to Hiroyoshi Tenzan who won the World Title four times and the tag titles TWELVE times. Kojima won the World Title twice and the tag titles seven times.

Dudes just get their asses handed to them. There were 14 teams in the tournament, and these teams finished 11th and 13th respectively. Oh, and I should also mention that the last place team was made up of young boys who NEVER win matches and went 0-13 in the tournament. Tenzan and Kojima finished ahead of one legitimate team, although legitimate is a term I use loosely as it had one legend in Togi Makabe teaming with Toa Henare who was not good enough to win the C Block Championship at the G1 this year. Legends get respect in Japan, but they certainly don't get wins.

Now how much better would WWE be if they incorporated the same philosophy? Instead of legends kicking ass, they would rightly get their over-the-hill asses kicked. Wouldn't wrestling be better if the following two scenarios played out?

I would love a world where Kane and The Undertaker tagged up and got actually taken to the woodshed by Lucha House Party, and people were legitimately surprised if they got a rollup win against The Ascension.

Wouldn't it be better if Triple H tagged up with Shawn Michaels just to get absolutely ragdolled by The B Team, and then you would actually be excited when they used their veteran guile to overcome The Singh Brothers.

You can't tell me that this alternate reality wouldn't be better than the one we are currently living in. And if you're asking, the answer is yes, this is just a long-winded way of saying Undertaker and DX have always sucked, and I will never understand their appeal. Kane is actually pretty decent, but all those old farts should be treated like New Japan's former stars, but probably leave out the part where they are forced into shoot fights against the best fighters of this generation, because Jon Jones would LITERALLY murder Undertaker and prove that you can kill what's already dead.

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Killian Dain

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today, we tackle the big man from Belfast, Killian Dain.

Since getting called up in June with the rest of Sanity, the most memorable thing that they have done is not have Nikki Cross there with them. I remember seeing them, asking, "Where's Nikki?" and never remembering anything they have done again. This may shock you, but I'm not sure if the WWE had an actual plan when they called the group up to the main roster.

In six months, Dain has been involved in seven matches, winning two of them, although they were both on the preshows of pay per views. Once, he teamed with Alexander Wolfe and Eric Young to beat New Day in a tables match before Extreme Rules. And secondly, he teamed with nearly every tag team from Smackdown to defeat ten jobbers from Raw.

It's pretty clear that WWE's plan for Killian Dain has been...(crickets), so it shouldn't be too hard to come up with improvement as long as I can come up with something.

The first thing I would do is get him away from tag matches and make him the clear stud of Sanity. Eric Young remains the leader, but treat Dain as the hoss that he is and let Young and Wolfe take care of the tag matches. Meanwhile, let Dain start putting on fun singles matches. The great thing about him is that he's not just big, but the guy can go. I actually think that he would be good in the spot that Andrade Almas is currently in. Facing off against top talent, having entertaining matches, but not quite having what it takes to come out on top. I know it's tough to break into the WWE Senior Division, but putting him up against Jeff Hardy and Rey Mysterio could both be awesome feuds for both sides where you can just sit back, relax, and actually be entertained by the WWE product.

Anytime you have a guy with size, it's fine for them to not win a belt, because their presence makes them important. My big solution isn't really all that big; it's basically let the big guy who is good at wrestling have wrestling matches, but in this case, it's quantum physics compared to the plan the WWE has come up with so far.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas
Bobby Lashley
Charlotte Flair
Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon

Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson

Shinsuke Nakamura
Tyler Breeze

Monday, December 10, 2018

What Happens to NJPW if The Elite Leaves?

Obviously, the biggest question in wrestling right now is what The Elite is going to do when their contracts run out in January. It appears that the Young Bucks, Cody, Hangman Page, and Marty Scurll are all free agents t the beginning of the month where Kenny Omega has a contract that runs until the end of the month. If they leave New Japan when it is all said and done, does that kill NJPW's impact in the American market?

Without the members of The Elite, the (North) Americans that are left are Juice Robinson, David Finlay, Chase Owens, Rocky Romero, Michael Elgin, Jeff Cobb, Killer Elite Squad, Best Friends, and G.O.D. That list is off the top of my head, so I apologize if I forgot someone, but I doubt I forgot anybody too important. Out of that list, I would say the guys with the most star potential are Juice, Cobb, and Davey Boy Smith Jr. from the Killer Elite Squad. Although those guys are super talented, they are widely known as a failed hippy on NXT, wait is that the guy from Lucha Underground, and The British Bulldog's kid. That's not the most inspiring viewpoint for many casual fans, and even with how good they are, I don't think you can count on any of them becoming a future World Champion.

Now, to just focus on the Americans is a tad xenophobic and I get that, but the reason I got into NJPW was last year's match between Chris Jericho and Kenny Omega. If you want to include the English speakers like Jay White, Bad Luck Fale, Will Ospreay, and Zack Sabre Jr. you could, but as bad as this sounds, those guys are going to be there to increase interest as opposed to causing interest in the first place when it comes to Americans.

Obviously things are cyclical, but it looks like NJPW would have to depend even more heavily on the Japanese talent to continue interest in the product. Although there are obviously a lot of great wrestlers, how many guys are totally must-see? For me, it's just Okada, Naito, Kota Ibushi, and Hiromu if he returns. Outside of that, I could basically take or leave the other talent. Even for a legendary guy like Tanahashi who I like, but I don't need to see Tanahashi matches.

There are only so many hours in a week to devote to watching wrestling. I technically play Raw and Smackdown on the TV each week, but it is nothing more than background noise, and if I cut out the noise, I don't think I'd be missing out. NXT is great, and NJPW has put on some amazing shows over the past year, but if they have that big of an exodus of talent, it would definitely decrease my interest in the product, especially if there is an All Elite Wrestling product to fill that void.

Ultimately, I still The Elite continues a working relationship with NJPW. I don't think you'll see Kenny Omega in a G1, Marty Scurll in a BOSJ, or Hangman in a World Tag League, but they should still make it around for big shows where they can legitimately be considered title contenders. They have made it very clear that they want to help out professional wrestling as a whole and having working relationships with NJPW, ROH, and even Impact would not only help their product but help create a real competition for the WWE. But if The Elite goes all in on the American market, it likely dooms any thoughts of NJPW expansion for the near future.

Right now, it is all speculation, but no matter what happens, it will continue to be the best time to be a fan of professional wrestling.

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Shinsuke Nakamura

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today is one that despite coming from a far away land, is near and dear to my heart, Shinsuke Nakamura.

Let's just start off with this. Shinsuke Nakamura is one of the greatest pro wrestlers in history. His in ring charisma rivals Hulk Hogan, and he has had a plethora of incredibly entertaining matches throughout his career. That being said, Nakamura is now 38 years old, and he probably has lost a step since his wrestling prime. He's shown that he can be great, but he''s not rivaling Kenny Omega for the title of best wrestler in the world.

Although part of the issue is age, part of the issue is that the WWE style doesn't totally fit into what Nakamura does so well. A big part of his style in Japan was mat-based MMA style offense, which makes sense since Nakamura did have pro MMA fights before fully transitioning into pro wrestling. WWE has always stayed away from this style, but making Nakamura's matches seem more like fights instead of wrestling matches would probably help him captivate an audience with his in-ring work.

Although Nakamura has held the NXT Title, the US Title, and fought for the WWE Title, it has been filled with a lot of forgettable dreck. Although he has had good matches with AJ Styles and most recently, Seth Rollins, they aren't going to be remembered. In fact, if you asked me which Styles match was good, I could only respond with, "Uh, I know one of them was." He's managed to have one great match in his entire WWE run, and that was his very first match in NXT with Sami Zayn. If you are just a WWE fan, you know him more for low blows than great matches.

Still, Nakamura's greatest trait is his natural charisma. When he makes an entrance, it is an event in itself. He shows more personality without saying a word than anybody in WWE history. Which is good, because most WWE crowds are, how should I put this? We'll go with mildly racist, and mildly may be giving them too much credit. If you talk with an accent, they are going to yell "what" at you instead of listening to the interesting things you are saying. Although I think he has had some good promos, memorably being selective on when he understands English, and a really good recent promo where he talked about how his feelings were hurt that Seth Rollins only wanted to talk about Dean Ambrose, his promos are not built for the WWE. Foreigners have to be goofballs for fans to want to listen to them, and PLEASE GOD, do not make Nakamura a goofball.

Instead what the WWE needs to do is let the world know that he is better than anyone else in the WWE. I know that's extreme, but his matches should not be a battle of wills, but instead having his opponents go in as raging bulls with Nakamura as the matador, always a step ahead. Have him make things look easy, only letting his opponent get the upper hand when his arrogance leads to complacency in the ring. Just off the top of my head, you could put on an amazing feud with heel Daniel Bryan who gets more and more frustrated with Nakamura and uses nefarious means to even the odds, another match with Sami Zayn where Zayn just refuses to quit despite clearly being outgunned, and having a believable scenario where Nakamura picks apart Brock Lesnar as Lesnar has to find a way to get his hands on Shinsuke.

My wife only watches wrestling when we go to live shows. We have been lucky enough to see some incredible talent down in Florida between NXT and a variety of independent shows. Through all of the talent we have seen, Shinsuke Nakamura stands above everyone else as her favorite wrestler, because the dude has a PRESENCE. He is a transcendent talent, and the WWE needs to be doing more to capitalize on that. Just let the man be special, and everything else will take care of itself.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas

Bobby Lashley
Charlotte Flair
Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon

Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson
Tyler Breeze

Thursday, November 29, 2018

The 5 Most Important Iowa Hawkeyes Who Could Declare For The NFL Draft

The Iowa Hawkeyes somehow managed to show a tremendous amount of skill yet have an incredibly disappointing season this past year. They showed they could blow the doors off teams, but also showed that if they were in a close game, they would make that one mistake that would cost them at the worst possible time. It was so frustrating and yet I look at this team, and I would feel totally confident picking them to win the Big Ten West if everyone returned next year. The problem is there is close to a zero percent chance of that happening. I would say there are five guys who could at least consider the possibility, so let's rank them to see who Iowa most needs to come back for their success in 2019.

5. Noah Fant
I hate doing this, because Noah Fant is awesome. He came in as a true freshman, and it was like holy shit, that guy owns. The his sophomore year, he made a massive leap and set a record for touchdowns by a tight end. Even though he nearly matched those numbers this past season, it was still seen as a disappointment as he could have done so much more. Unfortunately, Iowa did not find the right fit for him, and although that seems incredibly stupid, "That's football." Since Iowa does not know how to best utilize him and (SPOILER ALERT) there is another person at this same position later in the list, I can't put him any higher than fifth on the list even though he will probably be the first guy off the board in the draft if all of these guys declared.

4. Nate Stanley
If Stanley leaves, what does Iowa have at quarterback? No freaking clue, but what Iowa needs at quarterback is not greatness but consistency. Stanley has shown far more greatness and consistency, and it leads to games like Penn State where an average performance is likely enough to get the Hawkeyes the win. There is a chance that although Iowa would be less talented at the position next year, they could still have a better record. There is also a chance that this puts Stanley way too low on the list, and there could be a massive dropoff without him. I feel like it's closer to the former than the latter so that is why he is only fourth on this list.

3. Anthony Nelson
This may seem high for Nelson as Iowa has AJ Epenesa ready to take over one starting defensive end spot and would seemingly be fine with Chauncey Golston taking over the other, but a lot of the strength of this year's defensive line has been their depth. They already need some new faces to show they can play at the interior of the defensive line, so keeping depth at defensive end is very important. With Nelson and Epenesa starting with Golston giving them a breather, the Hawkeyes would again have the best defensive end situation in the Big Ten. The defensive line has always been what makes the entire defense great at Iowa so here's to hoping that Anthony Nelson can hold off those NFL dreams for another year.

2. TJ Hockenson
So if Hockenson and Fant both go, this Iowa offense could be in some serious trouble. The tight ends made the offense go, and there was nobody I felt better about than Hockenson as he reliably got open and made the catch. He even occasionally leaped over people. So it will definitely hurt to not have those options. But when has Iowa not had a good tight end? Before Hockenson and Fant it was George Kittle, before him CJ Fiedorowicz, before him Tony Moeaki, then Brandon Myers, Scott Chandler, Dallas Clark, and Austin Wheatley. Hell, even before Ferentz got there, there was Iowa great, Scott Slutzker. I don't think I could be any more confident in Iowa finding a good option at than tight end. It's going to hurt, but there is hope that a tight end steps up, that Brandon Smith and Ihmir Smith-Marsette take a big step forward, and that my main man, Tyrone Tracy is the real deal.

1. Amani Hooker
Hooker was Iowa's Defensive MVP. The dude was all over the field, and I had mixed emotions when he won the award for best defensive back in the Big Ten. Like, yes, he deserves it, because the dude was phenomenal this year, but also could the Big Ten do me a favor and keep his dominance on the down low? Where Hockenson made me feel the best when Iowa threw to him, Hooker was the guy that I felt the best whether they were running toward him, passing toward him, or just letting him be anywhere near making a play, because I knew that he would. Iowa is already losing Jake Gervase, so safety depth is already at least somewhat of a question mark. Without Hooker back, it would leave a massive hole in the defense, because his versatility makes everyone around him better. For the Hawkeyes, I really hope he comes back.

That being said, with Hooker, and anyone listed above, if they can get paid, then get paid. Outside of Stanley, it's tough to see anybody significantly increasing their draft stock. And even though my heart would love to see the Hawkeyes run it back next year, my head knows that these guys have all given far more to the University of Iowa than they will ever get back, so if they can get paid, go ahead and make money. 

Monday, November 26, 2018

The WWE Is Ruining... Jinder Mahal

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today may be my toughest test yet as I study the Modern-Day Maharaja, Jinder Mahal.

Mahal actually has a fascinating story with the WWE. He was a midcard bad guy when he debuted, but then turned into a jobber comedy act with 3MB, and then he got fired, likely to never be seen again. Although some WWE wrestlers thrive in the independent environment, raise their stock, and have the WWE come crawling back (see Drew Galloway), Mahal really didn't do that. Instead he took some bookings in Canada, Puerto Rico, and India against some pretty nondescript talent.

Instead, he got his job back by appealing to Vince McMahon and got as jacked as humanly possible. Was he enhanced by supplements? There is visual evidence to suggest that he was, but in the Wellness Policy, we trust, and maybe he's just got incredible genetics.

Still, even though he came back comically jacked, it did not lead to victories. After winning his big comeback match against Heath Slater. He went 2-34 the rest of 2016.

Did he catch fire to start off 2017? You bet your ass he did, through May 11th, he went an incredible 9-47 as the man was on an incredible hot streak. This of course led to him beating AJ Styles on Smackdown before taking out Randy Orton to become the WWE Champion.

Surely, he would start winning at this point. In his next 25 matches, he was an incredible 6-19. The most hilarious part of this was that he was somehow STILL the WWE Champion.

He managed to hold onto his belt until November 7th before finally relinquishing the title to AJ Styles and going back to his old ways with a streak of 2-19.

Inexplicably, he won the US Title in 2018 before losing it a week later. As of this writing, his last two wins were against Braun Strowman, because the WWE doesn't care so why should I?

Clearly, Jinder is a victim of the Peter Principle. He was promoted beyond his abilities as a WWE Champion and the results were disastrous. He was still promoted beyond his abilities as US Champion, but at least it only took a week to end that experiment. So how should the WWE best utilize Jinder Mahal?

Here's the thing with Mahal: He has a great look. I know hardcore wrestling fans have steered towards the importance of that, but it does still matter. If somebody looks like they can kick ass, it's a lot easier to believe them kicking ass. The problem is that Mahal isn't all that good at wrestling. Like, he's very good, but in the WWE, which is the best of the best, he's one of the worst. So it's not like the guy is worthless, it's just he's worth less than the position the WWE has put him in.

So let's use him to help enhance other talent on the roster. I don't think a win over Mahal should lead someone to a World Title shot, really, not even a US Title Shot, and you could give him a partner, but them losing wouldn't propel a team to a tag title shot. So instead of boosting guys to title shots, he boosts guys to a new level in a different way. I want Jinder Mahal to take his skills to 205 Live and start challenging the Cruiserweight division.

Now I don't expect him to drop down to 205, although that would be hilarious. Instead, I see him acting as a bridge to get 205 Live talent on the main roster. Half of that roster is bigger than Finn Balor and Daniel Bryan, so it's not like they don't have the size to succeed on Raw or Smackdown; it more seems like the WWE hasn't figured out a way to make that transition.

Wouldn't it be awesome if Jinder Mahal comes to 205 Live, maybe to avenge a beating that was delivered to one of the Singh brothers. He could come out as the Big Bad Wolf, but get his shit blown up by Cedric Alexander, Mustafa Ali, or Hideo Itami, and instantly, you have a reason to bring those guys to the main show and start competing as a heavyweight. I mean, you could start him off by having him smash guys like Jack Gallagher. He could have a match scheduled with Tony Nese, but they decide not to fight and just want to flex in front of mirrors together. The possibilities are limitless and incredibly exciting.

So yeah, Jinder Mahal should probably be a jobber, but make him a 205 Live jobber and really make it count.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas

Bobby Lashley
Charlotte Flair
Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder

Ember Moon
Kane
Karl Anderson
Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson
Tyler Breeze